You can't make this stuff up....

What a day we've had! It all started with me picking up our sitter. This girl has been sitting for me for several years, but has just this summer taken over the post that her older sister used to hold. She sits for me twice a week and also went to the beach with us. Thus far, she has been incredibly helpful and at the beach she was truly indispensable. Today, however, was another story. We got home and I insisted the kids go outside. They spent all day inside yesterday and were complete couch potatoes. So does she help me get their clothes on and get them out the door while they're both screaming that they won't go? No. She stands in the hallway watching me wrestle them knowing that I only have three hours with her to help me and I'm wasting a good 30 minutes. WTF? Finally, they go outside and she just sits there in her JEANS and LONG SLEEVES. Hello? It's 93 degrees outside! What was she thinking?
So that was our morning. Later this evening I'm sitting outside with the lovies watching them play and our new neighbor walks by and stops for a chat. Lovely person, really. And, I really want to make friends with this gal 'cause she has been seriously wronged by the gal who we bought the house from. LONG STORY. So what does my sweet, precious daughter do when she says hello? NO JOKE. She spit in her face!!! Full on spit. OH DEAR LORD IN HEAVEN. Definitely in the top five most embarrassing moments of my life. After apologizing profusely I took BabyGirl inside to douse her mouth in Texas Pete. Call me a bad mother if you will but I WILL NOT TOLERATE BAD MANNERS!
Later on, it was time for supper. BabyBoy is eating reheated pizza. Yes, Mommy had just a tidge of a hangover yesterday and ordered the requisite cheese pizza from the Papa. After two bites, he insists he's done. Here's how it went down.

Me: You must eat five more bites before you get up from the table.
BabyBoy: I will not tolerate this from you.
Me: Excuse me?
BabyBoy: There is no excuse for you.
Me: Ahem, WHAT DID YOU SAY?
BabyBoy: You're making me crazy.
Me: If you do not finish your dinner this minute I will go upstairs and disassemble the computer and you will not play games for weeks.
BabyBoy: That's not even a word and I can hook it back up anyway. I'll eat three bites and then I'm done.
Me: This is not Let's Make a Deal. You will eat FIVE BITES!
BabyBoy: That show isn't even on anymore.

What the hell? When did he start sounding just like me? He's five for Christ's sake. Finally, Dr. Daddy got home and put them both to bed so I could finish painting BabyGirl's room for the third time. I think I just painted it the color it was originally. Damn.